Self's the Man

Self's the Man

Oh, no one can deny
That Arnold is less selfish than I.
He married a woman to stop her getting away
Now she's there all day,

And the money he gets for wasting his life on work
She takes as her perk
To pay for the kiddies' clobber and the drier
And the electric fire,

And when he finishes supper
Planning to have a read at the evening paper
It's Put a screw in this wall -
He has no time at all,

With the nippers to wheel round the houses
And the hall to paint in his old trousers
And that letter to her mother
Saying Won't you come for the summer.

To compare his life and mine
Makes me feel a swine:
Oh, no one can deny
That Arnold is less selfish than I.
But wait, not do fast:
Is there such a contrast?
He was out for his own ends
Not just pleasing his friends;

And if it was such a mistake,
He still did it for his own sake,
Playing his own game.
So he and I are the same,
Only I'm a better hand
At knowing what I can stand!

Content
A narration of a marriage from an observer, who distances himself from the social norm. He watches Arnold, a flippant and comical character, rush around his chaotic lifestyle before comparing his own life to his.

Analysis
Larkin once said that to him, marriage inevitably meant, 'steadiness, faithfulness, constant companionship- and children' the very manipulated and awkward position of the tagged on, 'and children' exemplifies its interference with everyday life. An idea that is reflected in the chaotic setting of the house, the colloquial 'clobbers' and 'nippers' as well as the trimetric rhythm that creates this 'stunted life of spoiled desires' that came out of marriage. Yet all of this contrasts the bathos of the simple AABB rhyme scheme, 'trousers' and 'houses', that set the mundane and monotonous lifestyle Arnold lives- the syndetic listing of 'and' slows the pace to embody this, which highlights that steady and constant side to marriage and families.

The big question is whether the observer is mocking Arnold as he pities that lifestyle or because he wishes he had it. From the beginning, it seems quite clear that the narrator has a great distaste for such and 'establishment' as mentioned in the Importance of Elsewhere. He describes the superficial setting of the 'electric fire' conveying a false façade to society, living up to expectations yet not enjoying them. Likewise, the italic form of Arnold's wife nagging him, 'Put a screw in this wall' implies a dictated life, indeed full of 'spoiled desires' and he 'plans' to read the paper yet never actually manages to. This is confirmed in the 'painting' imagery indicating the idea of glossing over imperfections.

Yet there  appears to be a Volta in the argument when the observer claims he feels a 'swine' for not partaking in such tradition. Associated with grotesque, animalistic ugliness, this suggests he feels a certain ugliness for being so critical as if highlight a small amount of sympathy. However this can also be seen as society making him feel an animal and an outsider for not conforming, that actually he is only made to feel a 'swine'. This idea that the Observer is content in being detached from such a lifestyle is confirmed in the final image of him not needing to send a van, with connotations of insanity, there is a concluding idea that the false and forced 'establishments' of society such as marriage and children drive people to craziness, or perhaps the observer feels people who follow such principles are crazy? As we know he himself never engaged in such ideals.